School has started, and for some teens and their parents, so have the homework wars. Most teens juggle their responsibilities just fine, but for some kids, homework is excruciatingly painful. When school begins, the bliss of summer when families are getting along and enjoying each other’s company, gives way to nightly and epic homework battles. Parents typically meet the child at the door after school and the dance begins. Kids lie about homework, an hour of homework takes two to three, parent’s frustration boils over into threats, kids become defiant and everyone eventually goes to bed exhausted. AND the homework is still not done. For parents this is a mystery. But not for these particular teens. They can explain the pain, the utter boredom and exhaustion entailed in this nightly family ritual. The federal government also understands their pain and as a result, 504 education plans were created which allow for accommodations for those with learning, attention or mental health (depression, anxiety, etc.) struggles. Homework will never be a pleasant experience for these students, but parents can employ a few strategies which will limit the damage these battles do to the family. Here are 9 tips to consider now that the school year has resumed:

1. Set up a culture around homework: Most of us respond best to structure and consistency. Take advantage of that trait and establish a routine around homework for your teen. That means essentially creating a plan around when it is done, where it is done, how it is done and the rewards that follow completion. I believe teens do best when their homework is tackled right after school. They also do best when an adult is close by. Many parents choose the kitchen table or have their teens do their work while the parent is simultaneously doing their own paperwork. Let the teen know that their reward once homework is completed is freedom to enjoy the rest of the day.
2. Create a homework place: Involve your teen in selecting a specific place to do their homework. Stock it with all the supplies typically needed and decrease distractions. Ideally this will become “their” spot and they will take ownership of it.
3. Teach them to break homework down into small chunks and to prioritize: Not every child is as organized as we would hope. Some kids struggle to conceptualize how to complete a task from beginning to end. Helping your child learn to prioritize their workload is especially important given the diversity of assignments and due dates students have to contend with.
4. Allow breaks: For many teens, sitting for two hours straight with their homework is nearly impossible. We tend to want our children to tackle homework in one sitting without breaks. This is unrealistic. Instead allow for short breaks so that your teen can re-fuel.
5. Praise effort, not the end-product: The operative word here is praise. Remember, these strategies are aimed, in part, at eliminating the micro-managing and nagging that typically accompany homework. Pestering your child only serves to create an adversarial relationship. The primary goal should be for the teen to give 100% effort each night.
6. Transfer responsibility to your child and let natural consequences be part of the equation: Setting up the expectation that homework comes before fun allows the teen choices in this daily family ritual. In addition, allow other natural consequences to work their magic. Kids hate to disappoint their parents and they understand the relationship between homework and their grades. And like the parents, they also dread the nightly homework wars.
7. Study Skills Class: I know if I were in high school, this would be part of my schedule every semester. The more homework that gets done at school, the less opportunity for homework battles at home. It is also simply easier to do homework when sitting in a class with other students and a teacher.
8. Get a tutor: Obviously this can be an expensive option and is not available to everyone. However, for those students who struggle with homework, tutors can help not only with organizational skills and the respective subject, but also with consistency. Established appointment times work wonders with the routine of homework we want to establish.
9. Ask for a 504: Students struggle with homework for a myriad of reasons not of their own making. If your child falls into this category, contact the student’s counselor and ask for a 504 plan. 504 plans provide accommodations designed to support and enhance the child’s learning experience.

All of the above strategies are designed to lessen the burden of homework for all. Most are pro-active in nature and should be implemented from the moment your child begins to bring homework home. Establishing the culture of homework that works for the parent and the child is a win-win for all. It will also teach your child independence, personal responsibility and self-reliance.